Once again

I've come to the point where I feel super uncomfortable in my body. I've gained 40+ pounds in 3 years! What the heck. I don't know where my sexy walk went, and I don't know where I put my confidence. It's probably buried under those layers of unhealthy eating and drinking way more than I used to and definitely way more than I should.

The times that I succeeded the most were when I blogged and noted everything that I ate. This is definitely crunch time because I do NOT want to hate my wedding pictures for the rest of my life! I want to love the way I look in my photos! And if I truly am going to get pregnant again, I definitely don't want to do it with all of this weight.

I can feel the difference that these pounds make on my body. I can't stand for as long as I used to, it's killing my lower back to wash DISHES. That is a completely unacceptable feeling. I don't know why I keep holding myself back. I know how to get the body I want. I know how to maintain it as well! Now it all comes down to just forcing myself. I know how this ends. Diabetes runs rampant in my genes. I started this journey 10 years ago for that exact reason; because my grandmother died because of it, her sister died because of it. I don't want that same fate.

So here's to rising above the ashes and creating a new me!